Strangeness in the aftermath in a big house.
by Hunter2
Summary: Well...this is strange, but hopefully funny. Read if you want, and review just so I know whether to make more with different games/characters.


Reno burped and went back to chugging a Sam Adams Heavy. Cid and Barret   
were screaming at a game on TV, while Rude was doing that thing that only he can really   
do… sit and look like a total badass.   
Cid: Stupid $#$@%^ bastard! That guy was a mile away and he got sacked!!!!???   
@#$$@#$@#!$$@$#%$#@$%#@$@#$$#$@#$@#!$@#$@#$#@$#@$@#@"   
Shera:(bites Cid.) NOT IN FRONT OF MARLENE!   
Marlene: (on Barret's lap, stares at Cid in amazement)"Again, Uncle Cid! AGAIN!"   
(Cid blinks and we go to another group…)   
Tifa: So like, isn't my hair just terrific now? (she points to her now-blonde hair)   
Aeris: OH, totally, honey! It's just perfect!   
Yuffie: Yeah! I want hair like that! Can I have hair like that?!   
Sephiroth: I can dye it for you, sweeeeeetie! Just let me finish brushing this wonderful   
doggie's hair, m'kay!?   
Red: H E L P M E………   
Cid: Th' broad finally found a fiting hair color.   
Reno: Yeah. Another game?   
Barret: Damn Straight.   
(Rude deals a poker hand and they all play for a minute… Marlene slams down a royal   
flush and laughs.)   
Marlene: LOOOOOOSERS!!!! PAY UP!   
(All four men blink.)   
Narrator: And to another group…   
Elena: SolikeVinniedeardoyouknowhowmuchlikeTsengyouarehuhhuh?   
Ithinkyoudoyou'rejustascuteashimyouknowthatandsomethingelse   
(Elena continues yapping and veins on Vincent's forehead look as if they're about to   
burst.)   
Vincent: I'll kill you for this, narrator…   
Reno: (Laughing uncontrollably at Vincent) Jesus, the wannabe vampire finally got   
something for being an evil motherfucker! (He finishes the bottle of Sam Adams,   
immediately grabbing another, drinking the stuff like water.)   
Rude: Reno. Stop drinking. You smell like shit.   
Reno: Wait… hold on a sec…(He whips out his cattle prod and fires it up, then breathes   
on it, creating a giant fireball.)   
Palmer: Roast marshmallows!   
Heideggar: Ooh, ooh! Get in mah belly!   
Narrator: Moving again….   
Hojo and Scarlet: MM! AAAAAH! OOOHHHH!   
Narrator: Um…nevermind… now would be a good time to put Rufus in the story.   
(Shotgun blasts are heard from inside the Hojo/Scarlet room and Rufus walks out covered   
in blood with a disgusted look on his face.)   
Narrator: Told you it was a good time for Rufus.   
Barret: #$@#$# psycho got what he deserved.   
Cid: Pay attention to the game, Barret.   
Marlene: Yeah daddy! Don't wanna be a loooooooooooser again!!! HAAAAHAAAA!   
Reno: (burp)   
Rude: …..   
Narrator: Let's see how Vinnie is doing.   
(Vinnie is on the edge of exploding.)   
Elena:   
SolikeanywaysIwassayingthatTsenqandSephwerecutebutyou'realmostasgoodlookingbutt   
henagainmaybenot-   
(The Narrator [Me, for those who haven't figured it out] decides to make Vinnie get very   
lucky and go very evil…)   
(Elena's clothes disappear.)   
Vinnie: Thank you! (He pounces Elena.)   
Narrator: Damn right.   
(Red, Rufus, and Dark Nation run past screaming/howling)   
R/R/DN: (in unison) GET AWAY FROM US!   
Sephiroth: But sweeties, I just wanna play with your lovely hair!   
Cloud: (walks up behind Sephiroth) now, now, Sephy-hun… you can play with my hair   
all you want. (They smooch.)   
Narrator: O.O; I swear to god I was forced to write that….ANYWAYS! Back to our real   
men!   
Reno: (burps) Damn. I need a screw.   
Cid: Same here. (Shera smacks him) what?! (Shera smacks him again.)   
Barret: Damn right.   
Marlene: What's a screw, daddy?   
Barret: Neva' mind. Go play.   
(Rude nods and him and Reno sneak away.)   
Narrator: Moving again…   
(Cloud and Sephiroth are dressing up Aeris)   
Seph: Isn't she sooooooo pretty?!   
Cloud: Omigawd, definitely!   
Aeris: I look good! That's wonderful, guys!   
Cloud/Seph: SUPER!   
Narrator: Is it just me, or am I making this progressively more disturbing? Don't worry.   
It's almost over.   
(Reno and Rude snatch Tifa and Yuffie, and start laughing quietly)   
Tifa: Who're you? Oh well. Doesn't matter. Where are we going? A carseat?   
(Yuffie and Reno are already busy making out, and therefore I'm not gonna have them   
say anything [this is also because I'm lazy.])   
Elena: Oh Vincie, I just love those tentacles of yours!   
Vince: -Grunt-   
Rufus: (in a corner with shotgun cocked as Seph and Cloud come closer)   
AAAAAAGH!!!! GET AWAY!!!!   
  
The thankful, merciful END!   
For now. 


End file.
